I’m writing this entry not to embarrass anybody especially the person affected is a friend. Seriously, I sympathy her. This friend whom I knew through a friend-making network is married. I met her once when she gave birth to her only daughter in March this year. Normally we would sms or msn each other.
This morning she rang me. Initially, I was quite hesitant to answer the call. It’s my usual tendency of not answering call from unknown number but somehow I was prompted to answer this call. I was glad to hear from her although at the same time was guessing why the unexpected call. My heart sank when in a shaky voice she said that her hubby is having an extra marital affair. Actually this problem is not new. We’ve talked about it before but when she no longer talks about it, I thought the matter has solved. And I am taken aback because she had to swallow this misery throughout her pregnancy when I thought she was happy expecting her only daughter (her older children are boys) and that her marriage is going on fine.
Her hubby’s guts to two-time her when she was expecting his child really pissed me off! The reason for his action is really unacceptable. He claimed that my friend’s unwillingness to work to ease the family financial problem is the root to this problem. What a crap! Had she the opportunity to do so, would she be just sitting around the house doing nothing?! Come on. Ok, maybe it’s cumbersome to be a sole-breadwinner. My friend is not lazy, for goodness sake! She is willing to work but her children’s caretaking is the main issue here. Instead of pushing all the blame to her, he should discuss with her on how they can work out this problem eg. helps her find a nanny for the children if employing a maid or placing them in a childcare is costly. Do I make sense here?
Actually, I don’t buy that reason. Is having an extra marital affair lessened his burden? Bullshit! It’s just a lame excuse to push the fault solely to my friend. The fact is he’s doing it for his personal interest. The third party knows that he’s married but still persistent with the relationship. Is she made of stone or what?!! Hello, you are robbing the happiness of your own kind! Have you no heart??!!
I really look up to my friend for enduring this situation. If I were in her shoes, I would go on a raging rampage. I advice her to confront her hubby with the issue and not dragging this matter any further. I’m not trying to encourage her to end the marriage. It’s not fun to be a divorcee esp. when the children will be greatly affected. Perhaps she should consult a marriage counselor if the need arise. I did likewise when I tried solving my marriage problem with my ex-hubby. But when the matter did not improve and after deep thinking, then I decided to file for divorce.
To my friend, if you read this, I’m sorry for posting this story here. Rest assure that no one knows about you except me. I pray that Allah SWT gives you strength to go through this ordeal. Ring me anytime when you need a listening ear. I feel for you and I definitely hope I can be a help.
This morning she rang me. Initially, I was quite hesitant to answer the call. It’s my usual tendency of not answering call from unknown number but somehow I was prompted to answer this call. I was glad to hear from her although at the same time was guessing why the unexpected call. My heart sank when in a shaky voice she said that her hubby is having an extra marital affair. Actually this problem is not new. We’ve talked about it before but when she no longer talks about it, I thought the matter has solved. And I am taken aback because she had to swallow this misery throughout her pregnancy when I thought she was happy expecting her only daughter (her older children are boys) and that her marriage is going on fine.
Her hubby’s guts to two-time her when she was expecting his child really pissed me off! The reason for his action is really unacceptable. He claimed that my friend’s unwillingness to work to ease the family financial problem is the root to this problem. What a crap! Had she the opportunity to do so, would she be just sitting around the house doing nothing?! Come on. Ok, maybe it’s cumbersome to be a sole-breadwinner. My friend is not lazy, for goodness sake! She is willing to work but her children’s caretaking is the main issue here. Instead of pushing all the blame to her, he should discuss with her on how they can work out this problem eg. helps her find a nanny for the children if employing a maid or placing them in a childcare is costly. Do I make sense here?
Actually, I don’t buy that reason. Is having an extra marital affair lessened his burden? Bullshit! It’s just a lame excuse to push the fault solely to my friend. The fact is he’s doing it for his personal interest. The third party knows that he’s married but still persistent with the relationship. Is she made of stone or what?!! Hello, you are robbing the happiness of your own kind! Have you no heart??!!
I really look up to my friend for enduring this situation. If I were in her shoes, I would go on a raging rampage. I advice her to confront her hubby with the issue and not dragging this matter any further. I’m not trying to encourage her to end the marriage. It’s not fun to be a divorcee esp. when the children will be greatly affected. Perhaps she should consult a marriage counselor if the need arise. I did likewise when I tried solving my marriage problem with my ex-hubby. But when the matter did not improve and after deep thinking, then I decided to file for divorce.
To my friend, if you read this, I’m sorry for posting this story here. Rest assure that no one knows about you except me. I pray that Allah SWT gives you strength to go through this ordeal. Ring me anytime when you need a listening ear. I feel for you and I definitely hope I can be a help.
